A Language of Life

Dear Students:
I appreciate Marshall Rosenberg the creator of Nonviolent Communication, A Language of Life, much like I appreciate Moshe Feldenkrais. Both men gave us life changing methods that when practiced can lead to inner & outer peace.

Dr. Rosenberg taught people how to empathically listen because he knew that without heartfelt connections, conflicts could not be resolved. He said, “You see if we are using nonviolent communication and we learn how to empathically connect with what is going on in other people at any given moment, the other person cannot not communicate with us.  Because even silence is a very loud powerful message.”

Marshall explains more in the video above, about how he empathically connected with a young woman who was too afraid to speak to him.  He kept feeling “what was alive in her” during her silence and in a fifth session she was able to awkwardly give him a written message.  Because his patience & loving manner reached her heart a healing relationship began. 

Dr. Rosenberg’s Definition of Violent Communication: judging others, bullying, having racial bias, blaming, finger pointing, discriminating, speaking without listening, criticizing others or ourselves, name-calling, reacting when angry, using political rhetoric, being defensive or judging who’s “good/bad” or what’s “right/wrong” with people; ~Nonviolent Communication, a Language of Life, back cover.

In the other video (below), Rosenberg is interviewed and shares on topics ranging from how he created A Language of Life, to his vision for creating peaceful societies.  Enjoy reading some intriguing quotes that came directly from the interview.

Dr. Rosenberg’s Inspiration: “I wanted to look for people who were educated in a way that helped them to enjoy giving to other people no matter what the people around them were doing. And it was from studying such people that I saw that they used a different language than the one I had been educated to use.   They used a language of life, a language that helped them connect the life that was going on in themselves & other people.” . .

Marshall Rosenberg’s View on Domination Structures: “So for example if you want to have domination you need to teach people to think in moralistic concepts such as: right/wrong, good/bad, normal/abnormal and teach them that the authorities know which of those words is which – so who’s good, who’s evil, who’s right, who’s wrong.  So you shape peoples’ mentality that way and then they make good little boys & girls and good little citizens in domination structures.” 

Dr. Rosenberg’s Vision: “So what we really need are to create structures that support life rather than create this division to begin with.  So yes, until we get those structures in place we do need to do a lot of reconciliation work.  But we’re interested in primary prevention which means radically transforming the domination structures on our planet.  A domination structure being defined as a government where a few people dominate many for their own advantages.” 

Marshall Rosenberg on Restorative Justice: “Restorative Justice is a very radical concept because it means instead of punishing people we need to look at crime in a total context, a total community context, and we need to get the victim & the perpetrator & the community all involved in a healing and restoration of things to a place that is good for everybody.  And to be conscious that punishing a person is just going to make a society worse.”  

May this post & last month’s post help you learn better ways to relate to yourself & others throughout the holiday season.  Peace to all on Earth!
~Donna